Someone is Going to Marry Us!

Our wedding is still nine months away, but I have to admit that I was starting to stress about not having anyone to marry us.  Apparently June 4th, 2011 is an extremely popular wedding date. But we found her, and we love her!  (Well, Adam didn't really care, but I loved her).

We met with her at her house, and she was super outgoing, she smiled a ton, and she stressed how much she wants to make sure our ceremony is all about us.  AND she is writing a book with different wedding ceremony ideas and readings and vows, etc., so we have tons of material to look at and choose from for the ceremony.  (I am really into planning the ceremony too...I want it to be very "us").  She was also a minister at a Universalist church (which honestly I had never heard of), but apparently it encompasses many religions.  I am very interested in attending church at a Universalist Church...it could be a cool place for kids to experience one day.  (I don't know though, I'm still on the fence about it.)

Our officiant also seems to really care about our relationship, and she wants to weave "the story of our love" in to the ceremony.  I love that! (We have final say over the script though.) And answering questions about our relationship has made me appreciate Adam even more.

Here are 5 things that I think you should look for in a wedding officiant (if you don't have a family minister or priest):

Someone you are both comfortable with
Someone that you both trust
Someone who's personality fits both of yours
Someone who is willing to work with you and do what you want
Someone who you feel confident will make the ceremony a celebration of your love

I have already found several things that I want to include in the ceremony, and I am having so much fun looking through all of the ideas.  Planning the ceremony has been one of my favorite parts of the wedding process so far. 

I think these are some great traditions:

Unity Candles

Cake Cutting

Blessing of the Rings

The Garter

And the bouquet toss!

Adam and I are having so much fun picking out the music that's going to be played during different traditions!  There are so many ideas and endless suggestions...

I am hungry...RAWR

I eat breakfast every morning. No matter what.

I am usually in a rush, so breakfast generally consists of coffee (first thing when I wake up) and a Larabar or Nature Valley bar.  (I am especially fond of the "peanut butter" flavors of both...but I have a serious peanut butter addiction).  I used to eat lots of Fiber One bars, but I've been trying to eat more "natural" foods.  Well, kind of.

Last weekend we had pancakes one morning (a whole batch...just my fiance and me) and eggs and toast the other morning.  Strangely enough, we rarely eat eggs, but as soon as we are in the middle of a massive "egg recall" because of salmonella, we eat eggs two days in a row. We're okay so far (knocking on wood).  If I get reeeally lucky, we go to Golden Corral for breakfast, and I get to eat cake and cookies with my waffles.  (Golden Corral and I have a love/hate relationship).

Anyways, this morning I woke up hungry, really really hungry.  We had a normal-to-large sized dinner last night, so it doesn't seem like I should be starving from a blood sugar spike after a super huge dinner or famished because we had a tiny, veggie-only dinner.  This insatiable hunger happens to me occassionally...sometimes in the mornings, sometimes in the afternoons, and sometimes late at night.  Whenever I complain about this phenomenon, people tell me it's because "I'm not eating enough" and that "my body will let me know when I've had enough."  I don't believe this for a second.  You should have seen the way my fiance was looking at me as I ate pasta salad out of the serving bowl last night.  (Pasta salad with pepperonis and full-fat cheese).  It's not that I don't trust my body (I trrry to listen to my body), but I don't really know if I CAN trust my body.  Case in point: after an extra large meal at Golden Corral, I still want to and do eat three full plates of desserts.

Ok, so back to this morning.  I had coffee with splenda and powdered creamer around 7 and a peanut butter cookie Larabar around 7:45.  At 9 o'clock I felt like I was still starving, so I decided to listen to my body. Instead of just trying to chug two glasses of water (that doesn't usually work, by the way), I grabbed the jar of Trader Joes's natural, crunchy, unsalted peanut butter.  I ate the second half of the jar. 

Yes, I did mention before that I like peanut butter far, far too much, but I didn't feel out of control (like I was eating my feelings or anything)...and I feel full but not stuffed now.  Why does this happen? 

I have no idea.  Even more baffling is that I just started taking a new medicine that my doctor said would make me not hungry.  He also said that I would have to make sure that I ate enough and ate frequently enough.  (He warned that if I did not do this, I would be grumpy and starving when it wore off).  It is possible that the medicine has the opposite effect on me, but this "insatiably hungry" feeling has happened to me many times before.

I also have not been working out much lately.  ( I know they say that you should "schedule it in" no matter how busy you are, but I have been really busy...and I really like to sit on the couch and putz around the internet while I watch TV).  Working out can make me extra hungry, but I haven't BEEN working out.  Hmph.

So after a little research, I found some possible causes for this hunger that won't go away:

• Not drinking enough water (a possibility... I haven't been very good about that lately)
• Not eating enough protein (I think that I possibly eat TOO much protein...hello peanut butter! But, maybe it has to do with my lack of fruits and veggies?)
• Horomonal reasons (Yes, I do eat everything in sight the week before I get my period, but not right now)
• Hypothyroidism and Diabetes (I have been to the doctor more than once this year, so I think I am ok in this area)
• Pregnancy (Nope)
• Not eating frequently enough (I really do make an effort to eat every 3ish hours)

I've decided that the cause of my hunger is most likely mental and also from not drinking enough water.  I have a huge, gigantic and completely irrational fear of not liking the way I look in my wedding dress/not being able to fit in my wedding dress.  I am getting married in a little over 9 months, so I probably should not be stressing about this yet.  But I am.  I've already had nightmares.

See here's a little history about me and gaining weight before "important events." (And yes, I know that I am completely vain and that I have unrealistic idea of what "fat" is, but I'm just being honest here people.)

1. I never thought about my weight until I was 15, when, on the last day of 4-week summer camp, I could not fit in to the capri pants that I had worn there on opening day.  During that month I ate Kashi Good Friends cereal mixed with peanut butter and chocolate syrup (it was the last summer that they allowed kids to bring and have food sent from home),  I participated in several grilled cheese eating contests (I dominated by the way--I remember eating more than 7 one time), I ate second helpings and dessert at every meal, and I put peanut butter on EVERYTHING.  I was also supposed to go to New York City for a week-long modeling exhibition about two weeks after I got home from camp.  I still went, and I did fine, but from then on I paid attention to my weight. (By the way, going to all-girls camp for four weeks is supposed to be about gaining self-esteem and friends, not weight.)
2. This particular camp had really delicious food.  When I was 17, I was a counselor at said camp for 10 weeks during the summer before my senior year of high school.  I was scheduled to take my senior pictures shortly after I got home from camp.  Everyone's senior pictures always looked perfect to me in the year book, so I was determined to look perfect too.  I also had to jump right in to cheerleading practice and school.  I gained 10 to 15 lbs during that summer (you would think that I would be able to remember the exact weight since it was such a big deal then), and I hated the way my first round of senior pictures (and cheerleading pictures too) looked.  **Pictures, really?! Those picture do not matter at all now**
3. I was also sure that I would meet my future husband during my freshman year of college; so, obviously, I wanted to look my best.  (And to me, that meant skinny.)  During the end of that summer and the first semester of my freshman year of college I gained 20-25 lbs.  Yup, its possible...easily.  And I was super embarassed to see everyone from high school when I went to the "young alumni gathering" during Christmas break.  Yes, the homecoming queen and one of the captains of the cheerleading squad had gained weight.  (I assumed that that was every other girl's fantasy, and I had made it come true.)

Pokey Sticks from Gumby's Pizza

Probably an extra-large contributer to my weight gain freshman year

This is what I felt like...

And this is what I looked like.

(Ok, not really--thanks Lalleh for the iphone pic, but you get the idea...)

There are other less extreme examples, but you can understand now why I have a fear of sabotaging myself for my wedding.  Ofcourse I am a completely different person today, and I am much more concerned about my health and living a long, happy and healthy life with my hubby-to-be and my future children.  But there is still that voice very far in the back of my head telling me that I will sabotage myself. 

As I read over this post I realize how vain, crazy, and eating-disordered this post makes me sound.  Personality, honesty, kindness, and intelligence are just a few of the traits that I value now more than appearence (and I have been in therapy since I was 10 years old...I could BE a therapist), but I am still a female. And I'm a work in progress.

12 Reasons Why the Honeymoon is Stressing Me Out...

1. I do not like to fly.

2. I do not like touristy or crowded places.

3. Most resorts have good and bad reviews...but mainly bad reviews.

4. I stress about packing.

5. And flying. (Again.)

6. Strangers frighten me and gross me out (I have a serious people watching problem).

7. There might be a natural/man-made disaster (or terrorist attack/plane crash, case in point: Lost).

8. Housekeeping probably does not wash the bedspreads.

9. My luggage will most likely get lost.

10. Our mode of transportation from airport to resort and back will probably involve a run-down school bus with no a/c that gets hijacked by pirates (of some kind).

11. If one of us gets injured or sick we will be sent hours away to a dirty hospital where the doctor insists on amputating a limb.

12. I dislike everything about plane rides. The plane, the people, the noises, the smells, the take off, the time in the air, the landing (although I would be thankful TO land), the seats, that dirty feeling you have when you get off a plane, airports, lay-overs...and I could go on.

Registries

The thought of registering is completely overwhelming to me.  Where should we register? What should we register for? How many things should we register for?

It would be nice to have all coordinating casual dinnerware and serving dishes, coordinating glassware, and coordinating silverware. 

I would love to pick a china pattern...but how often would we realistically use it?

We do need new sheets and towels.  But there are so many different thread counts, types of material and sizes.  I need to do some research.  It's too bad I can't call Martha Stewart up and get her opinion. 

According to Bed, Bath & Beyond, the most important feature of a towel is its fiber content. (Ok, so my mind goes straight to beans and Benefiber and Fiber One. And farts. I just can't help it.)  Most towels are made of cotton or cotton blends, and the quality of cotton is based on the length of its staple or fiber.  The longer the staples, the more luxurious, durable and absorbent the cotton will be.

The most common types of cotton are:

• Egyptian: A long staple cotton grown in the Nile River Valley. Highly absorbent cotton that is strong yet breathable.
• Organic:  A cotton grown without the use of pesticides, herbicides and fertilizers.
• Pima: Named after the Pima Native American Tribe.  High quality and long staple.
• Supima: Abbreviation for "superior pima."  The finest yield of long staple Pima cotton that is grown exclusively in the U.S. by certified farmers.
• Turkish: A long staple cotton grown exculsively in Turkey.  Often noted for its natural sheen and extra durability.
• Brazillian: A basic cotton grown exclusively in Brazil.  Has a standard staple length.

And apparently the way that the cotton is put together can differ greatly too:

• Terry: Means that the towel has loops.  Most absorbent towels are made of cotton with loops across the entire service.  The longer and denser the loops are, the more durable and absorbent.
• Velour: Fibers stand up on the surface like blades of grass and are identified by cut loops which make make the surface of the towel smooth.  Enables clear display of printed designs and is ultra soft, but not as absorbent as terry.
• Combed: Fibers of the towel are combed to create soft and strong yarns by removing short uneven fibers.  The fibers left behind are long, straight fibers that are even and aligned.
• Microfiber: Modal or Beech are woven with cotton to create an ultra absorbent towel that dries quickly.
• Zero Twist: Twist refers to the number of twists per inch of yarn, so the lower the amount of twist in a yarn, the longer the loops, leaving the towel extremely plush.  With long staple cotton yarn, low or zero twist fabric can be achieved.
• Two Ply: Double the amount of yarn is used in the manufacturing process for increased absorbency and durability.  Tend to have a densely woven pile and a substantial, weighty feel.
• Hygro Cotton: The yarn has a hollow core to allow air space at the center of the yarn to absorb water as it runs down the loop which enables it to capture more water. Lofts well (umm, what?) and becomes extra fluffy with washing.

Ok, well now that we all know more than we ever wanted to know about towels, I'm going to move on to sheets.

100% cotton sheets are the most comfortable and the most breathable because they are an all natural fiber.  On the other hand, a cotton/polyester blend will not wrinkle as much and is more reasonably priced.  However, polyester sheets will not breathe or absorb moisture as well as cotton.  (I'm already won on 100% cotton.)

Cotton sheets are made of Egyptian, Pima, Supima, or Organic cottons.  Other sheets can be synthetic, blend (cotton/polyester is the most common), modal (a fiber made from the pulp of beech trees), or bamboo.

The weave, manufacturing techniques and thread count are also important to consider.

Weaves might include:

• Sateen: Has a stitch of four over, one under, placing the most threads on the surface, making it extremely soft, but slightly less durable than a percale or pinpoint.
• Pinpoint: Has a stitch of two over, one under.  It is more durable than a regular weave, but not as soft as sateen.  Often will soften after repeated washings.
• Percale: Yarns are woven one over and one under each other to produce a strong, long-lasting fabric.  Can be finished to have a crisp or soft feel.  This weave allows air to pass through easily, so it tends to be breathable.  Will also soften after repeated washings.
• Twill: Yarns typically woven two over and one under.  It can be easily identified by diagonal lines on one side of the fabric.  These sheets hold their shape well, drape well and are somewhat wrinkle- resistant.

Manufacturing Techniques:

• Combed: Cotton fibers are combined to create soft and strong yarns by removing short short uneven fibers.  Leaves behind long, straight fibers which are even and aligned.
• Compact: A process that significantly reduces the amount of hairy stray fibers and weak spots in the thread.  Fibers are compacted towards the core of the yarn as they are twisted. Also enables fabric to be resistant to wrinkling and pilling.
• Flannel: Medium weight fabric that is soft and fuzzy and is usually made of cotton with a napped finish on one or both sides.  Napping is a brushing technique that provides a raised surface with a fluffy appearance. 
• Jersey: Feel like a t-shirt and provide a stretchy fit. Knitted and not woven.

Thread count is the number of threads per square inch of fabric, both vertical and horizontal. The higher the thread count, the softer and more durable the sheet.  Look for at least 200 or higher.

Now we have to make final decisions about WHERE to register.  Or else I will register at every store with a registry.

Please Excuse my Hiatus...

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind...a blur of weekend trips, summer school classes, work, and babysitting!  The wedding planning has been put on the backburner for a couple of weeks, but we have gotten some of the big stuff taken care of...

I found my dress!!! It's amazing, and I absolutely love it.  And that's all I am going to say about it because my fiance wants to see it soo bad.  He has been informed that it looks like this:

Beautiful, right?!

Shopping for dresses was quite an adventure.  My mom and soon-to-be stepsister went with me.  There were so many beautiful dresses, and it was completely overwhelming to start picking out dresses from the racks.  The girl who had an appointment at the same time as me new exactly what kind of dress she wanted.  When the salesgirl asked us what we had in mind, the other girl rattled off every single detail that she wanted from the neckline to the fabric to the waist line and designer. I'm fairly positive that I had a "huh?!" expression on my face. I had no idea what half of the words that she said meant.  Needless to say, I felt unprepared and silly even though I had looked at lots of wedding dresses and watched countless episodes of My Fair Wedding, Say Yes to the Dress, and Girl Meets Gown.

Even with all of my television preparation, I didn't actually believe that the dress stores only had one sample of each dress.  In sizes 10 and 12.  Now, I am well aware that this is the average size for women in the U.S., but, being somewhat smaller than that, the salesgirl had to clip my dress all over so that I could have any idea of what the dress would actually look like on me.  I was also unprepared for the salesgirl to dress me.  I'm really not very modest--I don't change in a bathroom stall at the gym (in fact, one of my middle school PE teachers wrote that I was "quite the exhibitionist" on my report card)--but even I felt slighly uncomfortable with a stranger (albeit a very nice one) helping me to step in and out of dresses and pulling them up over my head.  In reality, it was probably my choice of undergarments that day that made me feel uncomfortable--wherever I was standing there was a mirror behind me.  I guess she's probably seen worse. Hopefully. Anyways, I will remember that for my future dress fittings.

I had no idea how many other decisions I would be able to make once I had my dress!! I know what kind of flowers I want, what I want the cake to look like, and an idea of what I want the bridesmaids dresses to look like.  At least what I want at the moment.  Currently I love:

1.  Cala Lilies. 

Yellow for the Bridesmaids

White for the Bride

Boutonnieres

2.  Simple cakes

I love the dots!

3.  Monograms

On cakes!

Bride's bouquet

Wedding favors

Dance floor projection

Pickard Monogrammed China

Engagement Pics Take 1.

I am so grateful that Adam was able to get the photographer that he does a lot of work with to take some pictures for us! We got some great pictures, and we definitely have some choices for our engagement announcement.

On that note, it was not exactly the most enjoyable experience.
**Warning, I am about to whine.

We were at the park by 8 o'clock this morning, but it was already so humid out that I felt like I was swimming.  The park was very green and made for an awesome back drop, but after twenty minutes I had so many bug bites on my feet and legs that I wanted to cry.  About this time my hair was starting to frizz, and I'm pretty sure that my makeup was melting off of my face.   As we walked down the rocky "steps" to a bridge in my completely inappropriate hiking shoes,  Adam said, "I bet there are so many snakes out here right now!"  (Cue excited, 8 year-old-boy voice.) Great, so I had to focus on not falling AND not stepping on any snakes.  We wrapped up shortly after that as it is hard to pose and smile when one is much more concerned with slapping the legs to kill bugs and avoiding snakes...and this was about the time that I decided my dress made me look preggers.

Although the actual event was slightly less glamorous than I'd imagined, we still managed to get some decent pictures.  Here are a few of the "low res" images:

Soo...we got a few decent pictures.

And here are a few pictures that are more "us":

I think this picture would be more appropriate if I had my finger up my nose.

Eeeehhh...

Awkward...who us?? Nooo

How does my handsome hubby-to-be manage to look so good in every single picture?!

Engagement Pictures!

Just found out that we are doing our "first set" of engagement pictures Saturday morning! I am very excited, although slightly nervous. I have serious issues keeping my eyes open in pictures.  I either look like I am on drugs or like I have bug eyes. Argh.  I have a feeling that Adam and I will be practicing our poses and smiles in the bathroom mirror tonight...we enjoy watching ourselves make faces.

Now we have to decide what to wear! I think that we are going to stick with a "blue-ish" theme and make sure that we look like "us." This could be challenging... and I guess I should probably change my orangey-red finger and toenail polish?! HELP. I will most likely break out from stressing out, fantastic.

Anyways, I am super excited. We are going to a park near our house early in the morning, so hopefully the lighting will be good and it won't be too hot out yet.  Our goal is to be as "uncheesy" as possible. Again, this could be challenging.

On that note, here are a few engagement photos that I have stumbled upon...

"The Serious Pose"

(Soo angry!)

"The umm, Spiderman Kiss Pose"

No thank you.

"The McCheesin' can I have a side of Cheese

with my Cheese Pose"

"The One-with-Nature Pose"

...just a little bit too "Twilight-ish" for me

"The Sensual Pose...?!"

Seriously, there are so many things wrong with this that I'm not even going to start.

On that note, I hope to have some of our own engagement pictures on here soon!  Please send positive picture vibes our way for pretty smiles and open eyes.

***I sincerely apologize for any stress that I may have caused to your eyes during this post.